peterdyckmancampbell:

I’m sick of rap songs telling me what to do… “Bend over! Slap your ass, girl! Drop it like it’s hot!” Yeah, I’m gonna write a song back and be like, “Boooooy, brush your teeth! Yeah boy. Bump that jacket off your back. I’m fucking cold as shit.”

ladiebear:

feral-femme:

[Aubrey] Plaza says her dream is to do a real ­middle-of-the-road romantic comedy, ­specifically one with Ryan Gosling, who once approached her in a juice bar to tell her he loves Parks and ­Recreation. “I’d work in a flower shop and be insecure. And he’d work in real estate—sorry, I’m pitching a movie to you.” She’s not sorry. She keeps pitching. “And there’s always cupcake batter on my face, and I’m like, ‘I just made these cupcakes, but I don’t know how I feel!’ And he’s like, ‘Let me get that cupcake batter off your face … with my dick.’” She’s cracking up. “Cut to me giving him a hand job. Sorry, I’ve had too much caffeine.” (x)

Aubrey Plaza you dreamboat

OH MY GOD, PERFECT PERSON

I think I may have found a project I’d actually enjoy doing, helping these cats and dogs. 

parks rewatch because hiatuses suck

↳ S02E03, Beauty Pageant

Aubrey Plaza @ Casa De Mi Padre premiere in Los Angeles (03/14/12)

Conan: You’re the most fascinating person I’ve talked to in a long time.